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Sunday, December 8, 2013

Down to the Wire: Writing a Thesis

My thesis is due in four days. I should not be writing a blog post right now but I need to get away from something so structured. I enjoy writing when I can do it freely. It's fun to write ideas down on paper, to go back and edit them until you get the wording just right. Maybe you lose sight of a typo here and there, but everyone will understand what you mean anyways.

A thesis is not like this. It's not storytelling. A thesis is extremely structured writing with attention to detail that must all flow in a logical order. I'm convinced my brain doesn't work in "logical order". My brain wants to jump around from one idea to the next. My mind lets me focus on my paper for no more than 10 minutes at a time and then I realize there are much more important things to do... like paint my toenails, or see what people are up to on Instagram. Then I remember the larger task at hand, return to my computer for approximately 10 more minutes before I realize I haven't showered yet today. Once I'm clean and dressed in stretchy pants, I'm finally ready to sit down and write for the day.

I take a deep breath, I start scrolling through the 30 pages that exist so far to see where I need to add more detail. What isn't flowing logically and where do I need to explain deeper or add more information. Man this would be so much easier if I only had an iced venti unsweetened soy light ice shaken green tea latte right now.... That thought is all it takes and I'm out the door with headphones in walking to a Starbucks I swore I wouldn't go to again because the customer service there is so bad. But let's be honest... I only have four days left to work on this paper, so it's pertinent that I not waste any time and go to the closest Starbucks I can for my aforementioned green tea latte.

With a latte on my desk and a kale and butternut squash wrap in my belly, I'm finally ready to write again. Here we go... Maybe I need a nap. Just 10-20 minutes. I mean I did just eat after all. I need to relax while that wrap digests. That's important. I lay down for a minute but my mind reminds there is something else I should be doing. I really need to enter that contest to try to win a pass to the San Francisco Yoga Journal Conference. I mean as soon as I'm done with this darn paper, all I want to do is teach yoga anyway. Isn't increasing my yoga experience in every way possible a better use of my time than writing a thesis?  Yes, yes it is. And now that I have yoga on my mind, I have been sitting at my desk all day (sort of, don't judge...) and my back is starting to get sore.  I need to go roll my mat out and do some asana practice.

I move through a few rounds of Surya Namaskar, I go into headstand which is known to reinvigorate the body and focus the mind, I finish with a nice twist on each side. 10 minutes total. You know what would make me feel even better? I need to get more oxygen to every cell of my body. I practice pranayama. My pranayama naturally guides me into meditation and after another 20 minutes I'm finally ready to sit at my desk again.

I scroll through my thesis once again to find a good spot to begin working. Then I realize I haven't written a blog post in a very long time and my two followers must be very worried about me and my whereabouts. I also just need a break from the structure. So here I am, letting my mom and my best friend know that I am okay. I am in Hawaii and I am going to graduate in less than two weeks because I will get my thesis done on time. I will have a perfect manicure, perfect pedicure, my skin and hair will be radiant and shiny. Every cell in my body will have oxygen, my body will not have any stiff spots whatsoever. I will be well fed and well caffeinated and somehow it will all come together and I will get it done. I will turn my final draft in in four days.